I had a rough week this week and had the horrifying thought more than a few times that I am just like all the negative habits of my mom. Perhaps stress brings out the opportunity to notice that old tape or maybe it is an ages old dance of shedding the layers of beliefs that others have put upon us while still living in appreciation for the gifts that they have also given us.

Mother’s Day is not just a Hallmark Card Day. It may actually be the most important day of the year.

I’m not saying that everyone needs to buy flowers and go to brunch. (Although, I do love those things!) I’m saying that this is perfect opportunity to “observe” the sandwich of where we came from, who we are in the present moment and where we are hoping that we are going.

After all, everyone had a mother, whether we treasured her, never knew her or did our best to “not become” her. We spend a lifetime trying to either get her approval or get over needing it in the first place.

And some of us also ARE mothers to others, whether by birth circumstances or life opportunities. And as the mother of two slightly 30+ year-olds, I’ve been letting go for quite awhile now. Watching my son grow into a man, who is standing on his own is easier somehow. We all know men can’t hide under their mom’s skirts forever. We encourage the change. But in watching my daughter strive to separate her Self from me, I fear that she will somehow not want to “be like me”. Intellectually, I know it is a natural part of the maturation process and ultimately a good thing. Emotionally, it is damned hard!

Today, I’m lucky. The world says it’s ok to honor, love and appreciate moms. So I’ll take the gift of openness and connection that they both do so beautifully! But the truth is that this cycle of life is not about a single day at all. Everyday is Mother’s Day. Everyday is a quest to identify our own place in the world. Everyday is a sandwich.